I saw something Saturday that was really weird but made me think about you.
Bare with me for a minute.
So I stopped at Safeway before a photoshoot to grab some treats for my clients and their kiddos, and I saw something…odd.
I pay for my stuff and I’m on my way to the exit. There’s a totally normal looking guy who's the age of a young dad walking in the same direction non chalantly in front of me with a stroller.
No big deal, right?
Well he slowly halts to a stop and turns himself and the stroller around and I get a quick glimpse of what’s inside the stroller as I walk briskly past - and guess what I see?
It wasn’t no baby, that’s for sure.
I see a large football laying on top of a soft pink baby blanket.
I did a quick double take but didn’t want to stare at the dude so I just mind my own business (as most of us could prolly learn to do - I’m no Karen, after all #nooffensetokarens) and kept on walking, but MAN did I want to ask why the hell he had a football in there where there should be a baby.
(Maybe I should have, I dunno. Just screw those social niceties when curiosity is involved.)
But first it made me think about those high school experiments in Home Ec where they give you an egg and you have to pretend it’s a baby and carry it around and keep it alive for a week. (Did you ever have to do that egg lesson in high school? Yeah me neither. I think that’s only in the movies.)
So, nothing against the person who came up with that, but I don’t think they had children. An Egg? Psh. Piece of cake.
Now, an egg that poops nonstop, cries multiple times throughout the night, runs into traffic while chasing bubbles and throws spaghetti on the floor would be sliiightly more effective in teaching abstinence, in this moms opinion.
But then that made me think about everything that moms go through and have to do. We do a lot man! It’s a full time job keeping these precious little people alive. Not only do we have to keep them alive but we have to teach them, nurture them, feed them, play superheroes and Barbie's, play nurse for real injuries, help them, drive them places, answer questions nonstop that we pretend to know the answers to, raise good human beings, and dont even get me started on disciplining and tantrums.
Throw in a full time job, online learning, and a partner and you might as well kiss that time for self-love good bye.
DON’T DO IT!!!
It feels impossible, I know, but after a year like 2020 the time for self love is right now. You simply NEED to dedicate some sort of self love for yourself everyday.
Not only will it make you feel better, but it will in turn make you a better mom, wife, friend, and worker, because when YOU feel better, everyone can feel those vibes.
And if everyone is feeling good vibes come off you, they’ll feel slightly uplifted themselves. I once read that if a happier, positive, and extroverted person sits in a room of depressed people, without even saying anything, their energy alone has the ability to uplift the energy of everyone else in that room.
You see that? By giving yourself even just 10 MINUTES a day to do something just for yourself, you’re basically making the world a better place by default and it'll make it so much easier to take on the daily frustrations of life.
And in turn save the world (it’s a win-win!). Move over Leonardo DiCaprio with your “save the planet” gig, we can take it from here! (just kidding come back we need you.)
If you can’t wrap your head around doing a little something for yourself, then try looking at it from a different angle - think of it as doing something for your kids or your partner, because by you doing something to make yourself feel better you’ll in turn be more relaxed, feel more accomplished, feel friendlier, and have more patience, which I’m sure our online learning kiddos would appreciate. I mean, even when you fly they say to take care of yourself first in an emergency before anyone else, right? There's a valid reason for that.
So if you can’t do it for yourself, do it for them. You deserve it, Love.
“Ok, Dre, that sounds great and all but what exactly do can I do with the zero time I have?”
Why, I’m so glad you asked.
If you don’t already, wake up just a little bit earlier and get some you time in before everyone wakes up. I actually do this one often and it makes for a great start to my day. During this bit of solitude you can:
-Listen to a 10-15 minute meditation podcast
-Listen to any Podcast you want
-Catch up on your favorite magazine
-Read a chapter in your book
-Work on a little painting
-Do some journaling
-Color in a coloring book (an adult one or otherwise - I won’t judge you)
-Put your earbuds in and listen to some tunes
-Go for a walk around the block with your coffee
-Play Animal Crossing (I legit did this every morning for like a year on New Leaf. Don’t judge me.)
Whatever you do, don’t use this time to clean, check social media, emails, or get work done! This is strictly YOU time, Chica, no one else’s. Do something that brings you joy, do not do something that takes any sort of energy away from you. This is important.
Those are just a few suggestions that I personally do that work for me, but there’s always the tried and true ones like:
-Paint your nails
-Lock the family out of the room and watch an episode of Real Housewives with a glass of wine
-Use a special clay or sugar body scrub every time you shower
-Eat your favorite desert without shame
-Eat your favorite desert with shame then do 30 minutes of Pilates
-Even asking your partner to plan dinner for the night can be an act of self-love.
I think by now you get the gist of what I’m saying.
With all the worlds craziness going on, one of the most important things we can do is take a moment to show ourselves some love. Get in the habit to now to start your 2021 off right. Even if it is just 10 minutes in the morning with coffee and your magazine or a clay scrub in the shower.
You got this, girl.
If you want a print out of these reminders to pin next to your bed, your workstation, or your bathroom mirror, you can grab a free downloadable copy here! xoxo